One of the things I like about the HYC group of Bloggers is that I am able to connect with some very wise people, many of whom are Christians so there is an added empathy. I feel your prayers. I so appreciate you, more so because I am not as faithful in prayer as I once was.
A wonderful coincidence this afternoon. I finally set up to watch Revive TV here Recently I up-graded our wireless internet to make it affordable to watch their videos once more. During the first 30-40 minutes of worship one of the leaders brought a new song, a prophetic song of 7 words. "The pain that you've known is over." I cried, discretely because I'm sharing the living area with TWJ. So precious.
Tomorrow I will go into church. Friends, Denise and Kevin Reid, are preaching there. They have an amazing ministry of teaching, healing etc into the more difficult and poorer countries like Myanmar, where they support with great sensitivity and wisdom an orphanage, India where they hold teaching, healing and deliverance to largely women. They even pay most of the costs for these women to attend conference and the women travel, often on foot for many days. I decided a little while ago to commit to going to church on Sundays as often as I can once more. I don't want to become a committed member of this church, in fact I may choose to go to another in the long term but in the meantime I will be satisfied with what is available.
It is only in recent years that I've struggled to worship in Churches that are less lively than I desire. My home Church is more than one hours drive away and I can't afford the petrol right now to go more than once every couple of months. It's silly to become so picky when we all believe the same thing, it's just a matter of style. Part of my reluctance comes from the idea that life is too short to waste effort on something that doesn't entirely please me. I'm not too sure that this is healthy thinking if it means I'm not involved in regular gathering together.
I am almost out of the funk. I am still losing weight although I'm still not having breakfast early enough in the day so am down to 2 main meals and 1 or 2 small snacks, and not drinking enough water but I'm doing better today and a lot better than a couple of days ago. I'm pleased that this did not begin an eating jag but I have not had any great craving. I was hungry a little while ago this afternoon. My old way would have been into the bread with loads of butter. I opened the bread and put it away again. Not because I needed to stay on program but because it wasn't what I wanted. I grabbed a few, like 6, thin water crackers, smeared with cream cheese and that is that until dinner unless I get hungry again. If I do I will eat a raw carrot.
It's good to be feeling stronger again. Oh! and another blessing today. I'm not sure how this happened but back in 2000, 10 years ago, (I can't believe it's that long), I discovered an Australian weight loss website. It was very active for a few years but recently has become lively again. I found this out when I did a random check. I am so pleased. That's an understatement. I'm excited and will enjoy the forum.
I'll be back sometime tomorrow and report my emotional progress. I literally curled up into myself, froze with fear, wanting to shut out my immediate world. It amazes me that after all these years I can still have bad reactions in certain situations.