I feel so much better this morning. I will definitely go for a walk..... I have, and enjoyed it too. That's my first real walk for months. We probably only walked a couple of kilometres total but at least I was outside again. I took A's dog and was told not to let him pull me. He didn't take much notice of me so I am going to teach him to walk properly on a leash and 'heel' as he is supposed to do. He is a very intelligent dog, a shetland collie. TWJ is going around telling everyone how Jake the dog, picks up his toys and puts them in the toy box when told. I tell you A is going to be a ferocious mother .... in a nice way. She is a well respected Nanny so we are curious to see how she manages her own children when the day comes.
I am so enjoying being here in Christchurch. Not that we've done anything in particular so far but it's so nice to have a change of scenery and be with the S.I. part of our family.
Lean For Life - Day 11
I didn't write anthing about yesterday's workbook because I was really too tired to face it. The chapter had the brilliant title, Learn To Manage Stress and You'll Learn To Manage Food,' with the sub-title, 'You can learn healthy ways to manage your stress and anxiety.' Stress and Anxiety are the basic cause of almost all my slips into backsliding I should be taking this more seriously. I think I'm going to have to repeat this section many times before I can say I'm using healthy methods in dealing with the bad/tough times.
As an exercise in awareness and admission I'm going to list the major stress items in my life.
1. My family responsibilities are often overwhelming.
2. I'm self conscious about my appearance and concerned about my weight.
3. It has become difficult to do some of the things I want to do. I have had to curtail many of my church related activities and this means I don't see as much of my friends as I want.
4. My mother is a few weeks off her 95th birthday and has serious heart problems. She needs my support and help.
5. I'm concerned about my health. I've been dieting and over weight for so long my health is surely compromised. I do take medication to reduce high blood pressure which is not always as well controlled as it should be. I also have acid reflux, had one lot of surgery and don't want to have any more.
6. Our income is too low to meet our monthly bills. We have been going backwards big time since we threw in our part-time jobs at the SuperMarket last October/November.
7. I am a part-time care giver to my mother. I am the eldest in my family so shoulder the full-time responsibility although our daughter, who is an R.N.is the primary and most important carer.
8. I'm concerned about my level of fitness. This goes side by side with my health and weight issues but I'm working on them all so not much else to be said about that.
9. I have a son who lives independently but has many needs. He's a paraplegic, has some mental health problems and a very small income.
10. We have some other issues in our family which we have kept from the extended family. They are not problems but the potential is always there, like a smoking bomb. Will it explode or fizzle, and there is little to nothing I can do to influence the out-come.
I'm not kidding when I say I have a stress filled life. We may be retired, with a guaranteed income and all our children are independent but that doesn't mean it's an easy life. I know some people have more grief in their lives than we do, but that doesn't make our situation more bearable. We have some real stuff to deal with and the only way is to learn to live with stress. Pretending it's not there is idiotic.
I've just looked at a list of ways I respond to stress and shock, shock, shock! Out of a numerical value of 40 I score 32. I miss out on headaches, sore back and shoulder muscles, increased smoking and increased drug or alcohol intake. The only reason the last two don't figure is because they have never been my choice of poison although there have been a few times when I've been tempted to drink myself to oblivion.
There is a detailed description of how to release tension through neck and shoulder massage which I find quite difficult to do. I think I need a hands-on demo.
Lean For Life - Day 12
"Who's In Charge of Your Inner Committee" This is all about those inner nudges. some nice, some helpful, some need to be got rid of and most are warning signs that can be used to be prepared and avoid slipping off your weight-loss program.
Quoting from the book, - "Perhaps you can recognise some or all of these common 'voices,' as well as adding several of your own.
Your Frightened Voice "I'm afraid I'm not going to do this right."
Your Angry Voice "I'm, never allowed to do or say what I want."
Your Critical Voice "Don't even bother - you don't deserve it."
Your Joyful Voice "Hey, let's do this! This is wonderful!"
Your Curious Voice "I'll figure out a way to do this!"
Your Loving Voice "I'm with you - no matter what!"
Your Confident Voice "I can do it!"
Cynthia Samper Graff gives the following advice.
When most of us hear our negative inner voices, our first inclination is to silence or ignore them. There is, however, another possibility. Whenever you become aware of a negative voice, you can welcome the fact that you're being warned of possible self-sebotage. Listen carefully to what the voice is saying. Is it telling you something you need to hear? If it's simply afraid and reflecting old doubts, reassure it. Tell yourself it will be okay, just as you would tell a child in need of comfort. Then do what you've decided is in your best interest.
Remember: The members of your Inner Committee aren't issuing commands. They're merely voicing fears and concerns. The decision as to which voice has the greater influence is ultimately yours.
I need to listen to the warning signs and take suitable actions so that my healthy lifestyle is safeguarded.