Thursday, 21 January 2010


I am really enjoying not having to get organised to go out. Ordinarily I go to Mum's house 15 days every month. Over the holidays there have been other family members around so there hasn't been the same need for me. Sadly this is the last day until Monday. We need to shop and I would have ignored that except we have a small task at the bank which we will complete tomorrow. Not working is also in my favour except that I am really not sure how to make our money go round. There are so many payments, rates, mortgage, insurance, telecom, power, petrol, Visa, that by the time we get to groceries there is NONE. So far I've been able to juggle payments but that usually ends up doing no more than 'robbing Peter to pay Paul.'

Must see if I can get some sale items together before the next Craft Market which is only a week or so away. I have to try ... don't seem to have a choice. I don't mind the making and I don't mind the banking but I really am not happy selling.

Yesterday I wore out a path to the loo. I thought surely it would reflect in a weight loss. Not so! How much fluid have I been retaining. It certainly has become a bother over the last year. My legs and especially feet get quite tight and very uncomfortable. I have on occassion resorted to using one of Mum's diuretic tablets. I know that is not what I am supposed to do, but when did I follow the rules? I do not want my Dr. to increase my meds on a regular basis so every now and then I do a little emergency self help. I will be seeing her again in about a month or so and am hoping that I will have upped my exercise and decreased my food intake, especially fats and carbs, enough to bring my body into a better balance. I don't hold out much hope of coming off the med. to reduce blood pressure because there was little difference in 2007 when my weight was at least 15 kg/33 lbs down and doing lots of stuff well.

I guess I am accepting that even though I can make my body and mind a healthier place there are some things I cannot change. I can expect there to be some gut and other internal healing, especially the liver. I cannot expect my skin to look better. All the gross signs of age are creeping up on me. Even being fat has not saved me from crepey skin, then there are age spots, keratosis, warts, and down falling bits and pieces. I will never recover the perkiness of youth. Sigh! But I must not be discouraged, as I have been in the past. I am well used to cover-up clothes to avoid showing the worst offending bits so that will continue. BUT I will be able to look more attractive and have a better selection of clothes, And I will feel healthier, fitter! Isn't that a good enough reward to go through the pain of disciplining my food and drink intake?

OOps! Plan B for today involves going to the bank. Bother!!!!! Now I need to shower and dress and reconsider my food options as we will be out for a couple of hours at least.
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