I have become so stressed out it is ridiculous. Surely you would think I have had time to learn to go with the flow, chill out, take life as it comes and all those other cliches.
TWJ has double pneumonia and was close to becoming a hospital case. He has almost completed a course of antibiotics and still very shaky and coughing a lot. It's a long weekend here, being Labour Day on Monday, celebration of worker's rights and possibly the 8 hour day/40 hour week. The earliest he can see Dr. is Tuesday and he will have been without the antibiotics for 2 days. I'm not very happy about that but as he is better than last week am hoping that he will be given another, maybe long term, antibiotic and all will be well. I do not want to have to take him to hospital or for X-rays, all of which involves 1 & 1/2 hours drive one way.
I've stooged along this week getting one day nearly right then losing it altogether again. I haven't been sleeping well and seem to have done a lot of minor running around. Being a long weekend my work roster has been slightly changed as the shop is open until 9 pm instead of 8 pm and being a holiday destination people shop as though there is going to be a famine for a month. And that's without the booze. I'm quite pleased about the way I'm handling the weighty items and the continuous stream of customers. Sometimes I barely have a chance to lift my head to acknowledge customers, and sometimes I do wish they would go away but mostly I've kept a good attitude and been able to cover my frustration when people seem stupid. Yesterday I had to get trolleys for goodness knows how many women who had managed to carry too much stuff in their arms, dump it all on the counter and then dash away from the checkout to collect a package of beer as well. There was no way they could carry it all out. All adds to the business of an already busy time.
AND we had the supervisor from Hell on. I was supposed to be able to leave as soon as things got quiet, hopefully 8.30 pm, which it did, but 'her' wasn't going to let me go. I'd had enough of 'her' so yelled at 'her' and was really cross with myself for not handling it better. As a result 'her' asked me if I was going to work today then checked the roster. 'Her' took great joy in telling me I start an hour earlier than usual. I know I should have checked but I'm totally annoyed that they can change my hours without warning me. Unfortunately 'her' is Supervisor during my hours this afternoon too. Can you tell I'm %@*#%%*#.
My good Christian attributes, long suffering, patience and kindness are AWOL. I guess I will make an extra effort and get myself prayed up before I start. Talk about emergency praying!
The good thing is TWJ and I have done a little talking and he has agreed that working is getting too much and we should just learn to live on our Superannuation. I am adamant that he is not going back to work in the chiller and freezer. It's beginning tp look as though he will be off work a total of 4 weeks.
I'm not sure how well we will manage without the extra income. It looks impossible on paper what with the mortgage and still paying off our trip but somehow we will do it. Let's say we will have a financial adventure learning to live on the smell of an oily rag. Gifts will be home-made, mostly from things i already have stored and plan to do something with one day! We will resurrect our garden seriously and look after it properly. The owner of the shop is away until Nov. 4th but I'm inclined to write our resignation letters and hand them into the office this coming week. I'm not sure how this will work out because I know we have been overpaid a couple of times. E.G. the first week back after our trip was paid in advance so we might have to work an extra week to pay them back. Depends on how our holiday pay works out.
I will be free to take up the bakery job if they accept me, but I won't know for a few more days yet. I will offer to do a trial week without pay to see if I can hack the pace.
So that's me at present. Getting ready to go to work and face the Atmosphere. Worrying a little about TWJ. Worrying a lot about our finances. Stressed by our commitment to my Mum. Worrying about how we will cope with all the birthdays, our 3 sons have their birthdays eldest & youngest on the 13th and G on the 15th and the wedding next month, then TWJ's 74th birthday on Dec 1st. Concern for our daughter, Mum's primary care giver, who's work is pushing her to the limit right now and her partner has moved out. (Broken heart?) Add to that disappointment over our jobs. The little job I took on 18 months ago, with great joy, meeting people in a different way to anything previously experienced and being in paid employment for the first time in 45 years, has become a nightmare.
Life keeps on going and never ceases to be 'interesting.' The sun is shining. It is a beautiful day and I need to get my hair washed and start getting organised for work.