Monday, 11 May 2009


Today is one of those days. It could have been a day relaxing at home,getting the laundry done and tidying my pile of paper stuff that drives TWJ mad but he daren't touch t because he doesn't know the difference between keepers and rubbish. Nor do I some of the time. But it won't get done today.

We have run into serious financial problems regarding our holiday and I have to go to Mum's where I can use a landline, discuss options with Jay and Mum and banks. So frustrating as we all have all the money we need at the end of July but we need it in the next two weeks as Jay & Os are due to leave on 25th. We left things a bit late and our bank's criteria have changed in the last month so that we no longer are able to get the mortgage top-up we expected. Sign of the times and very stressful. We both have been planning for over a year. Os wants to go home to Turkey for a family celebration and Jane was looking forward to meeting up with friends. Our cruise was booked a year ago and is all paid for. There is no way I'm giving it up without examining every possibility. I have money tied up in family property which is inaccessible during Mum's lifetime. I could have done things differently from a legal point of view but would not have felt comfortable so we continue to pay the price of my father's will. It all seems so unfair. My brothers walked into their inheritance before Dad died while my sister and I are tied to caring for Mum. It's not something that bothers me too much but times like this is so frustrating.

I guess my response should be .... "God knew all the time how things would be and he always has a better plan than anything I could devise. Therefore I should be thanking Him for this situation and however it is going to work out because it will be for our good." Not easy but based on Romans 8:28 and the knowledge of the goodness of God; and He is sovereign in all things.

If things don't work out it won't be the first time my plan is different to God's but I do wish He'd give me better warning.... Or maybe it was there and I chose to ignore it. Regardless we are in this situation and I need to do what I can to sort it out ASAP

Food & Weight. I managed reasonably well yesterday although tired and glad it was my last shift at the Supermarket for the week, and I now have 3 days off. I would like to work more hours but physically am just not up to it with my back still sore and not having whole days at home as often as I would like. I was hungry last night and the soup, although substantial with veges, was not enough. I avoided the bread trap but ............ I went shopping for dried apricots and almonds to divide into nice little snack packages for my 10 minute break when at work. I saw this and that and managed to avoid everything except the brazil nuts, gourmet dates and jazz cherries. Have you ever tasted a jazz cherry. I discovered after I had eaten a couple or more that they are soaked in raspberry juice before drying. What a wonderful taste explosion. They are definitely better than chocolates but not for me. It was so hard to control myself. Just as well I only bought a few as I kept going back for another. So my carbs were up yesterday afternoon, what with a banana, date, the cherries, and apricots. Then there were the nuts. I lurve brazil nuts so it was hard to stop myself at 3 or was it 4 nuts. All healthy food but has thrown me out of ketosis but not for long.

Today I will have a walk and it is a mainly protein day so things like cold meat, boiled eggs, 85gm can lite tuna, knob of parmesan cheese with some lettuce... oh and of course my berry smoothie for breakfast.

I seem to be drinking enough again without recording it all the time so will just continue there as normal. For me this can become a normal lifestyle. No counting, no obsessing. OK I do miss some things but they are only things like bread and baked goods that should be treated with caution anyway.

On that thought I must get moving as the morning is starting to drift away on me.
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